Author of ‘In Search of You’
A warm welcome!
Grief is a wholesome response to something or someone we have loved that has been taken away from us. It is not a weakness to grieve; quite the opposite, grief it is a humane response to loss. Our fears around the subject have had us avoiding or turning away from the grief-soaked person, for fear of saying or doing the ‘wrong’ thing. Turning up with genuine warmth and caring cannot go wrong.
Holding back our feelings and putting on a good front, is not the way forwards. Allowing the feelings on the other hand, is. However, the emotions and feelings of deep grief can be intense, so may well feel scary. Support is needed. Creativity helps the grief to move through us, things such as art, writing, gardening, dance and walking. We have been taught to hold back our feelings for most of our life, yet until we allow ourselves to feel the grief, we will not be able to touch base with joy. Instead, we will find ourselves stuck in some middle ground, neither sad nor truly happy, a sort of in between elixir of no-man’s land. Many people are stuck here. I know I was. But I’m certainly not any more.
We have inherited our ways of dealing with, or rather not dealing with, grief. Let us hand down a different legacy to those who follow after us, knowing that grief is a deeply humane response to loss. You might say that grief is love that has nowhere to go.